August 31, 2022

 It is our baby Anderson’s 11th birthday today. We have missed having him in our family for all eleven of those years. His younger brothers started school this week. Colton is now in kindergarten.

Mary Harvey informed me first thing this morning that Alan Herrington passed away yesterday. Liza had talked to his niece last night and she told Liza that he had contracted covid and was on a ventilator. He has been months in the hospital following heart surgery. The heart condition had developed as a result of his earlier cancer and he was in a weakened condition. My heart aches for Janice and her family. They will have difficult days ahead. He has remained as Temple President during these months and the Mckenzies and Rempels have carried on with the Rolfsons assisting them. I am certain Salt Lake will call a new President and Matron very quickly.

Camille and her little girl Presley were airlifted down to Children’s Hospital on the weekend from Prince George. Presley has been diagnosed with lymphoma cancer and will be here having chemotherapy for several months. Camille’s husband and little Nova are staying at Ronald MacDonald House by the hospital. They drove down. We are trying to figure out how to provide them with meals.

Trevor left on Monday and Liza, Keaton and Sayde arrived on Tuesday. Sayde has an appointment at Children’s today. Liza is going to leave the children with me and return home to drive to Edmonton with Brendon. They are taking furniture to Bryson who just flew out to Edmonton to start at UofA this year. Big changes. Liza ran the Penticton Ironman on Sunday and struggled with cramping and throwing up but managed to come in fifth. Cindy and family went out to support her and help with the children. 

Trevor flew to Utah to visit Justin and family after leaving here and Tammie was meeting him there. Trevor worked while he was here starting meetings at 5AM and finishing at 2 PM. He managed to get to the gym most days, go to the North Shore for Chinese food picnic part way up Cypress overlooking the water and city (with Cindy, Sam Kona and me), attend puppy class with me, take me out for dinner on our 52nd wedding anniversary at Beatniks and attend the ward Luau with me. Ross and Sarah came to visit Saturday and we took them out for lunch at White Spot. Busy week.

Kona is doing much better with walking and riding in the car but is having more accidents in the house. I am not certain if all the company is throwing her off. I took her for a long walk today and she is sleeping now. She went to Vet for more shots on Monday.

Our Wedding Anniversary was both difficult and nice. I had a good cry in the morning and struggled with Tom not being here but I do know he is near and I am grateful for that. Mary Harvey brought me flowers and cake, Joanne called and Trevor was here for the day and took me out. I will always miss him every minute and look forward to being together forever. I love him so much and pray for him in the work he is doing.

Cheyenne left for school at Queen’s in Ottawa. We will miss her. Jean took her down. She brought me flowers and donuts and left a plant on Tom’s grave. She had dinner with Trevor and I a couple of nights and Jean also one of those nights. I had prepared food for a young mother who just had surgery and Jean and Cheyenne got to share the leftovers from my preparations with us.

Went for allergy tests myself yesterday and found I have none. I already knew that but the ENT wanted to rule that out with my chronic sinus concerns. I also picked out film to put on my windows to help prevent the turf burn problem. Busy week with comings, goings, events and happenings. I am blessed and tired but Kona does now sleep through the night!

August 24, 2022

 I have Trevor with me this week. He is able to work remotely but because his colleagues are pretty well on the east coast he is required to start meetings at 5:00AM. The upside is that he finishes his work at 2:00 PM our time. It makes for a long day for him though. His home is very busy right now with Zach and Jadyn both home, each with big dogs added to their own two dogs, and each with personal challenges. Trevor is feeling the pressure and having a little break as he visits me and then Justin and JayLynn with baby Treyson in Utah next week. It is our 52nd wedding anniversary this week and I think that is another reason he decided to be here this week with me and take me to dinner. He is turning 50 soon and dealing with midlife he decided to go skydiving yesterday and did so in Abbotsford. Exciting and he loved it!

Cindy came to puppy class with me last week and it helped to have her drive with me, hold the dog, carry the crate and just be there for support. Once more Miss Kona was shy and didn’t want to participate. She stayed in her crate but finally came out to watch and Janet felt she was making progress. She does not like driving in the car, going for walks or going to puppy school but she is improving with everything. She loves to be with me and follows me everywhere but runs if I want her to come to me. She loves to play with me and be snuggled but she is worried about what I want if I move toward her. I think that behaviour came from her first home. She is good with people and warms up to everyone quickly. Cheyenne comes to visit regularly,  the Sister missionaries came for a visit and Cindy’s family come often. We introduced her to Buddy this week and, after a little tension, they were fine. She doesn’t bark at every dog or individual we pass when out walking. I have decided that she doesn’t need to go outside in the middle of the night and she settles back down if I wake her when I go to the bathroom. I just give her one trainer treat. She is a little lover and has lots of love to give.

I am still struggling with a solution to my artificial turf melting. We know it is from reflection from the windows and I think it is the bedroom windows from the looks of it. I have had two different market umbrellas and three different umbrella bases this week and have finally decided on one of each. I am hoping that the umbrella can interrupt the light stream a little. I am looking into outdoor window film and outdoor blinds, both expensive options. It has caused me stress.

Cheyenne comes over often  to play with Kona and visit. She leaves for Queens University tomorrow and we are going to miss her. She is a sweet little spirit and just getting interested in boys. I am hoping and praying she stays close to the gospel.

I am grateful for the boy of my life and my heart and I miss him terribly. I am trying my best and hope it is enough. It is all I have to give.

August 17, 2022

 I continue to be overwhelmed with with the kindness of others. I received a plant from Wendy Mckinley, zucchini loaf and zucchinis from Sandra Barroby, Chinese food from Jean, lovely letters from Jackson and Jill, help in the pet store from Robin Timms and kindness and love from people at church. My cousin Rick called to extend his love and support and Cory Wanner sent a message of love and the Jensens and Anatsuis in London sent kind words after I reached out to them regarding the Temple presidency changes coming up at the London Temple. So much goodness in others and I feel the beneficiary of much. The Sister missionaries came over this afternoon and we had a lovely visit before Sister Hawkes is transferred out to Abbotsford.

Kona has been able to start walks now that her vaccinations arrived at a certain status. It is more like meandering rather than walking as I am suppose to let her take the lead. It is a big world out there and she is frightened and needs to sniff everything. She is very happy to arrive home again. She was the shyest puppy at dog school and really didn’t want to participate. We have practiced some skills this week at home so I hope we do a little better. She has had a few accidents in the house and we cannot have that so there is some work to do there. She is fun and loving though and when not romping, she loves to sleep. 

Cindy tried to help our niece Natalie’s friend this week by trying to get him to the bus back to Calgary when it seemed he could not accompany his group on the West Coast Trial hike due to a previous leg injury. Cindy’s car broke down and I went to rescue her while the young man had a kind older gentleman take him the rest of the way to catch his bus. Cindy helped me with some errands before I took her home.

Sam attended FSY this week held at UBC. The youth seemed to have a great time and Cheyenne has been over a few times telling me all about it. Cheyenne likes to come over to visit and see Kona. She has a date this week. I think it is her first. She sang “Day by Day” again at church on Sunday. It was beautiful and brought the spirit. It is a special song and left me in tears.

I went out to Archway Dental Clinic where Tom did volunteer dentistry for seven years on one or two Mondays each month while we were in the Temple presidency and during the year before our mission. I gave them a donation of $2,600. Jon and Marsh Hoyt had given me $2,000 US when Tom passed and I exchanged it to Canadian dollars and felt Tom would be happy for me to give it to the clinic. They were so sad to hear of Tom’s passing but grateful for the donation.

Our children and our grandchildren have their personal and family struggles. I hurt for them and pray for all of them. Tom always said he would be gone long before me and I was to stay and take care of the children. I am trying and I am also praying that he can be an angel in their lives. I am certain he is.

August 10, 2022

 The children have been away this week with Cindy and family camping with the Burgess family at the Burgess family annual Shuswap camp and Trevor and Tammie in Mexico. Rissa was the only one at home and they went camping on the weekend while Cindy, Sam, Trevor and Tammie returned home. Paul met up with his parents and went to Alberta for a family reunion. 

Kona and I have been spending time basically at home getting into routines. She is doing really well but she has much to adjust to. She has only had two accidents and those could have been avoided if I had been more attentive. Jean came to stay with her one day while I ran to the bank and Cheyenne came another time when I went to Stephanie’s home to help teach her with the missionaries - sisters and elders. Cindy came with me on Monday when we went to see the vet for the first time - Dr. Jin. It went well and she had three shots, an examination, nail trim and ear clean. She was hurting a little that evening. She has slept thru most nights but has been up once during the last two nights. She is still not able to be around other dogs until a week after her vaccinations were given and she has built up antibodies, so she is  basically in the house and backyard. I have taken her the cemetery a couple of times. She still needs to learn how to be on a leash. I have signed us up for seven dog training lessons starting this Thursday. She likes to play and chew but she also like to snuggle by my feet and know where I am. She loves to nap too while curled up in a ball.

I have cleaned the house, the fridge and have tried to tend to business and make necessary phone calls while we are more confined to home. I went to all of church on Sunday and I am anxious to get Kona more independent to stay home alone when I have to go out and also happier to go with me when I can take her with me. I am missing Tom every minute. I miss talking to him about my concerns and my decisions and just telling him how much I love him. I hurt when I see his appointments popping up on my calendar. I pray for him in the work he is doing now and I know he is happy but still concerned for us. I have had a talk with Barb concerning her struggles and a long talk with Carolyn when the money I sent her was delivered. She has difficult trials and she needs to talk. We have grandchildren and children with concerns too and I pray for them. I hope I am being of benefit in some way to all of them. I continue to have the odd card arrive and I still receive phone calls and messages of concern and love. I sometimes need to express my own feelings and do so in messages to the children. Life is a challenge but I am grateful for a Heavenly Father and a Savior who know and understand it all.

 

August 3, 2022

 Will I did something that surprised even me. I bought “Kona” with Cindy, Paul and Sam’s assistance. Cindy checked if she was still available and set up a time on Thursday for us to go see her in Surrey. The couple who had her were Asian and had a male and female poodle that had bred. Kona was the only - no litter.The parents pups were very upset with our being there and showing interest in Kona. I held her but had no overwhelming love at first sight feelings. I was trying to be realistic  and make the right decision. I told them I was not prepared to take her that day as I had no dog supplies and I wanted to think about it too. I went away uncertain and then prayed about her that night. I felt Tom was urging me on. Everything he ever does is in consideration of me and I did want to know his feelings. I know he wants to know that I am alright. I made the decision to purchase her and on Friday the Hardy’s again went with me to purchase dog supplies. The cost of this puppy was really going up. The couple said they would take $300 dollars off the price in respect for Tom’s passing. On Saturday after my Temple shift we went again to Surrey and picked her up cash in hand. She came home shy, timid and not interested in eating or drinking. She did not whimper or bark at first. She is very cute like a picture perfect puppy. It is now Wednesday and she has not as yet had an accident in the house and enjoys the backyard. She is opening up more all the time and becoming acquainted with the house, me and my ways. The only mishap has been chewing some baseboard in the bedroom. She is playing more and she loves to sleep and just wants to make sure she knows where I am. She is good with people and everyone loves her. She has things to learn but she is sleeping well thru the nights and I cannot really complain about anything. She is a little ball of love. I also have people prepared to babysit when I need to be away.

The Temple is closing for two months and that situation also seemed to allow for me getting Kona at this time. I did my regular session last week and served my Saturday afternoon shift helping another sister go through the Temple for the first time. I really enjoy being a LOW - Live, Ordinance, Worker helping with new patrons and sealings. Saturday was also Tom’s birthday making it a tender day for me. Our girls decided to honor him by buying ice cream sandwiches, which he love, and doing random acts of kindness in remembrance of their serving father. They handed water and ice cream sandwiches out on a hot day to people who seemed to be in need. I was proud of them and I would love to make it an annual event on his birthday and ask other friends and family to join in. I miss him every minute but I am trying hard to find my path and make it meaningful. I just happened to get Kona on his birthday too and maybe that also has meaning.  Perhaps Kona and I can do some good in the world together. I am going to miss the Temple as this, other than the covid closure time, will be my longest period without the Temple. When Kona is able we can go for walks on the Temple grounds.

Trevor and Tammie are in Mexico this week and Liza and Cindy at the Burgess annual Shuswap camp out. Brendon’s sisters have returned again. Rissa is the only one at home. Zach is with Jadyn and Trey in Nashville. Mo is visiting Zach. I am trying to get Kona settled and get a few business affairs in order. The weather has cooled a bit but I am still trying to keep my new yard watered. Kona enjoys the artificial turf as we are unable to take her on walks until she gets to the vet and has her second shots.

My life has taken yet another turn and for a person who loves consistency that can prove challenging until I establish some type of consistency once again. Oh, how I miss my precious boy. A puppy adds life and companionship but nothing and no one can eliminate this pain and Kona will have to just weep along with me.